I love my work as a coach. I truly believe it is part of my authentic existence to spread messages of self love and growth as well as assist in goal actualization through direct contact with individuals as well as written word. It fulfills my purpose while living out my passion.
Many of you probably think I started writing this blog to entice more athletes to entrust me with their racing training. I sincerely hope to inspire you all, and am honored when I obtain more athletes. But, I am in fact not writing this blog with the sole purpose of reaching others.
I need to write this blog to live as my most authentic self.
I will get more into the above topic in the weeks to come, but I felt it worth mentioning before I take a bit of a detour of writing from my heart to offer some more practical coaching tips. I do want you to be inspired and learn from me, as teaching is also a role that validates my authentic self. Enjoy some unlikely how-to’s on how to think more about your thinking.
In order to believe that I could be in a place of discomfort, sadness, anger, or even pain and eventually be okay, I had to build a foundation of truly knowing myself through learning and practice.
Practice Thinking about your Thoughts
Have you ever taken the time to think about what you are thinking? It is estimated that the average person has over 6,000 thoughts in one day. Our thoughts control our feelings and our feelings our actions. So, if you are unhinging your thought reel all day, you will most likely not be aware of why your actions and decisions are reactionary and emotionally driven. To reference last week, your chimp will be having a hay day every. single. day. As in racing, you need to practice, or train, in order to capture your thoughts. Take short amounts of time to think about what you are thinking. Write them down. Think about them.
Capture your thoughts. Examine them. Question their truth. Decide how you will react.
Do not ignore, hide, shove down deep, or invalidate any thoughts. They find sneaky ways to keep coming back. If you decide that a thought is not true, tell yourself that and let it go, replacing it with something that is true. Be gentle with the chimp. It does not take well to being tossed aside or ignored.
Stop Looking at other People and Outside Sources for Validation
Once you are able to have more of a grasp on your thoughts you will start to learn how and why you make decisions. My hope is that with this knowledge and deeper understanding you will start to trust yourself more. You will look to others for inspiration but not for validation. You will be able to better hear and accept constructive criticism from trusted sources.
Slow down and spend some quiet time listening to your own voice. Educate yourself on the tactics outside marketers use to make you believe that they know more about your needs. Consider who you trust to share your thoughts with and be open to challenges. Get rid of the constant flow of validation or distraction of your thoughts from family, friends, social media, the news, or other internet sources.
Hear your thoughts. Trust your voice.
You don’t need any validation to do what you know is right. Live and speak as you.
Try Something Hard and Focus
Luckily, we can practice capturing our thoughts easily by spending some time in our own head. This has very little to no overhead cost, other than time and sometimes alarming awareness of the crazy that can live in your mind. The next step is to choose a goal to practice applying your new awareness. I personally prefer physical goals and have found that they are an exceptional way to put all of this into practice. I use the process of these goals to capture, examine, validate, or replace thoughts. After years it is exciting to be able to be working at what I truly perceive to be the height of my capabilities while still hearing and wrestling with the chimp and professor voices. I honor what I know to be true, my purpose and why for setting the goal, not the desire for comfort in the moment.
It is vital that you are connected to your own voice in order to know yourself and to have a fulfilling, honest life. To know you are living firmly as you. Knowing you is essential to establishing an ironclad purpose for tackling any goal. This purpose is necessary for completing the goal to the best of your ability. Setting goals is an important part of living life to the fullest.
So, talk to yourself. Wrestle with, trust, nurture, and honor those voices in your head.
And don’t try to hide it. It is the amazingness of you.